Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Very hard day...
Well I shouldn't say it was a bad "day"....Matt got to ride with me! He surprised me right before I was leaving. I was SO excited!!! Then we stopped and got gas on the way there, Matt found a penny heads up!! He felt like it was a good sign. We drove to Cincy, the took some blood, and we left. We stopped to eat on the way home. Matt and I were having a great time together. We talked about "baby stuff" on the way home... Now looking back I wonder why I let myself get excited... They called and left us a message at 3:46 with our "bad news". I just can't understand why? What have we done to deserve this? And why are there so many people who have them but don't even want them? Maybe it's not our "time" but I don't want to be 40 and having kids.. I want to enjoy my children. I pray that God will open our hearts and minds to what's next for us... I pray it comes soon.. Really not sure how much more of this I can take... I feel like I leave a piece of myself with every negative test... And there isn't much left.
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"For I know the plans I have for you....Plans to prosper you, and not to harm you...." I've never been on that side of the coin, but I know how it feels to loose that chance, my friend, if I could say it will go away....I wouldn't be a good friend, but I will say dig in to the word, claim those promises God has for you, becasue he means them.... You will see the pain lessen.... and you will start to see the plan God has for you... This is not the end, this is only the beginning to how he wants your Family Story to read... For whatever reason my friend, this is the way he has you going.... you never know, years from now he could call you to go into ministry for women who are dealing in this same spot. I think God calls people out of the situation he allows them to experience because he knows that with that knowledge you will spread his Glory!! Hang in there love, my prayers will never stop, your name is always on my heart and I know God has an amazing family for you...in his time. Love Always!
ReplyDeletei love you! praying for you guys always. especially now for HIS wisdom and guidance in your next step.
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